Editor’s note: This story contains adult language — sort of. We’ve substituted all epithets with more polite terms to avoid offending any delicate sensibilities (and to keep our jobs).
Congratulations, Columbus — you’re a bunch of potty mouths.
“What the fudge?” you ask? Well, when it comes to profanity, residents of the capital city need a good mouth-washing with soap more than any other city in the U.S.
If you think that’s a load of bull, you’d be wrong, according to a study by Preply of the cursing habits of more than 1,500 Americans in the 30 largest cities. Columbusites were found to use four-letter words a whopping 36 times per day, far outpacing the national average of 21 times per day and beating out metropolitan meccas like Los Angeles and Washington, D.C. (Surprisingly, New Yorkers ranked among those who swear the least!).
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Trailing Columbus at 30 obscenities per day was Las Vegas, followed by Jacksonville, Florida, where residents utter a measly 28 curse words each day.
Mother of pearl, that’s a lot of cussing! Why so sweary, Columbus? Where in the h-e-double hockey sticks are denizens spouting all these vulgarisms?
According to the survey’s examination of situations where people are most likely to curse, 69% of Americans were most apt to do so at work, with Columbus inhabitants — along with Detroit and Philly locals — being the likeliest to engage in on-the-job profanity.
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A majority of Americans are also likely to swear in front of strangers (67%), at the dinner table (63%), and in front of elders (53%). Fewer are willing to swear in front of kids (48%) or directly in front of their boss (39%). Road raged be damned, only 7% of Americans cuss the most when driving.
Other findings:
bpaschal@dispatch.com